“Between the heart and the tongue lies an abyss,’ he said. “Remember that. Thoughts must be concealed, particularly since you were born, to your great misfortune, a woman. Think so that they think you are not thinking.
-Olga Tokarczuk, The Books of Jacob
It’s no surprise when a person talks about hate because there is no heart. We can’t talk about good things and hate them simultaneously. It’s a different situation.
The alternative for these things is just by being as honest as possible as you can and letting people decide for it. Forcing and manipulating someone can’t help and it complicates things, and in the long run, trust sinks. It helps a lot to show and act as honestly as possible when you can.
Mark Tacastacas 
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